"God, In this ambiguity of life that often leads to confusion and conflict. Please guide my heart to the man who would give me more peace.
I know God peace is one of the hardest parts of life to attain for I have to work so hard every second of the day to hold myself together internally to acquire it. It's like putting all my broken pieces together to make it whole again for I need to learn how to get peace so that I can give peace. As a human being, oh God it's not easy. It's like walking on a fire barefoot. However, changing myself from the inside out to the best of my ability to be the best woman I can be is something that I can give back as my appreciation to you for being present in my life. Unfortunately, Father, I cannot entirely trust myself to rely on my thoughts and feelings because I might lead myself to trouble. You see me from above, and you are the only one who can see the biggest picture of my life. So I give all my trust and faith in you to find the best man for me at the moment who could make my world a better place to live.
My judgment Oh God, I must admit, I cannot trust. In You I feel peace to know that whoever I come across from this day on, whether they are from the past, the present and the future. I believe that I manifested it because of your grandeur will for my life.
Oh God if you happen to give that man to me. I promise I will not be a burden. Instead, I will be a vessel of your unconditional love and be his light to stray him from darkness. I will be his anchor and strength when He couldn't find his. I will try to take extra care of our relationship and nurtured it the best way I can and as long as I can. I will strive to love that man the way He should be loved without possessing him for his freedom would be my liberty. I will not change the way you have carefully formed him. Instead, I'll celebrate his presence of how you have created him to be. I will only try to see the goodness and the best of himself out from his imperfection. I will not build expectations and judgement for I will only love the raw being that He is.
I know whoever you will bring into my life whether that man would stay for a period or longer. I know it's always under your will and I can only embrace and welcome him with a grateful heart. When that man's purposed is served and I've experienced what I needed to learn for my spiritual growth. I promised that I'll let him free with a happy heart when it's time for him to go. I can only smile and thank that precious being for passing by and will bless him on his new journey with all the love I have. If, that being stays with or without me and love me until my last breath, I can only smile for I know indeed true love exist.
You know I wanted so bad to feel the feeling of being in love, to love and be loved. Life is intangible and has no guarantees so I don't mind anymore whether I would be in love with that man in a humanly way or not. As long as your will aligned my life and I have peace within and I feel complete, happy and contented of myself.
Well if it's not too much to ask too, I pray that whoever He is, I pray that He is the man who is praying the same prayer as I do.
I am floating Oh God; you lead, and I'll follow. I am not holding my life anymore for my spirit is in your hand, blow me to the right relationship who will help me grow and blow me to your greater plan for your greater glory. I'll take everything that you will give me. I will not complain. Instead, I will be thankful."
